Get all 24 Brian Bulger releases available on Bandcamp and save 25%.
Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Golden (one take), Exist, Exist, Meanwhile, Dead Language, Massachusetts, Dissolve, Quick Step Manic, and 16 more.
1. |
Tater Tots
03:51
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The tv in the dmv is
fuzzy and confusing
A bride laughs about jewelry
A man talks about roofing
There’s fussing and there’s wallowing
Hints of methamphetamine
Glances that say a lot
Chances of a melting pot
Children and ghosts
Filter through the door
Elbow acquaintances
Half-assed decor
A woman cries in Spanish
as a line begins to form
Maximum occupancy
The room is getting warm
The counter is inching closer to my number keep composure
My stomach is tied in knots
From a lunch of only tator tots
Cancer in our bodies
Just waiting for it’s chance to say
Not much time for recess kid
Hurry now it’s judgement day
Put me on my knees
Put me high up in the trees
Forgive me when I’m petty
Warm me when it’s 3 degrees
Sing to me when I’m in the shower
Grappling with my own existence
Thinking of my awkward times
Choosing paths of least resistance
But what if I had been myself
When I came out of someone else
What if I was taught to live
And not to prepare for hell
The counter is inching closer to my number keep composure
My psyche is tied in knots
From off-brand microwaved thoughts
This song means nothing
Think of all the places this song could play
Like when the oven timer goes off
Or when you tell your parents you’re gay
It could play as you take a shit
It could play as you throw a fit
It could play as you shave your head
It’s playing now as you go to bed
This song means nothing
And being alive is silly
This song means nothing
And being alive is silly
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2. |
Massachusetts
04:59
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Heading out to Massachusetts
Haven’t even taken a sip
God I wish I was born there
And not just taking a trip
If a nosey neighbor would have called again
They’d have picked me up and set me down at random
Russian roulette with the country
Please just anywhere but Branson
I don’t wanna be
My fathers son
I saw the house you were born in
Your father sheltered you in love
Never knew I was so Italian
Your brothers showed me my blood
You left a home that loved you as the daughter you were and the victim you are
Momma tell me you feel bad
More than you feel stuck in his arms
Yes she was wonderful
But she was gullible
Top of her class
Majored in math
Fell for the loner who was sick
Shared psychosis
I don’t wanna see
My momma gone
I am the limb that fell from grace
Trying to find my place
Trying to find my place
Set me down at random
I’m trying find my place
I don’t wanna be
Anyone but me
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3. |
Meanwhile
03:34
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I don’t wanna be the one with a story
Beautifully boring
Loving home
Picket fence
Give me silver spoons
And money to pay the rent
Hell I’d even be a lawyer if it meant I could get some sleep
You could put me in the middle of nowhere if my brain was clean
I know you’ve got grit
And benefits
You’re blazing your path
Wind at your back
And meanwhile
I’m on the brink
Of feeling normal
It’s harder than you think
I don’t wanna be the anomaly
I wanna relate to what you’re saying to me
Yeah my mom used to do that too
Yeah I also had friends in school
I also dressed up on Halloween
Won medals and figurines
I was hitting par on the green
My grocery lists included breakfast and name brand snacks
Don’t expose it, the lie is better than the fact
Don’t make me look bad
Don’t make me look back
I know you’ve got gifts
And benefits
You’re blazing your path
Wind at your back
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4. |
Exist
03:47
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All my friends are dead-end-job writers
Pulling video game all nighters
The ignorance of their potential
Walking with their pants around their ankles
Talking shit on themselves
I join the conversation and spell
The words of their subconscious
I’m obnoxious and the best of friends
I meet them down at the cool kids club
Share with them the current drug
Mix in my pride with the misery
Purgatory energy
One lacks ambition
One is on a mission
One shakes his head at the college kids wishing
Dreams are for body bags
I feel safe in thrift store tags
No my parents won’t put my picture on the fridge
But my Minecraft house is sick
And my friends know I exist
Is it enough to just exist
Is it enough to just exist
Don’t need a Wikipedia page about my accolades
Piles of the deals I’ve made
No 20 year bonus
Don’t even know where my phone is
Can someone call it
Can anyone control this
Chaos in motion
Plans set in Stonehenge
Me, I’m a tourist of tradition
Many have been and died and done it all over again
I know how this ends
I know chaos wins
So I’ve joined forces, we’re friends
Is it enough to just exist?
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5. |
(Purgatory Energy)
02:06
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Emerged from the water
A lamb for the slaughter
Death as a martyr
Was all I aspired to be
What a twisted dream
Drank Christs blood for the meme
To be part of the team
That felt so weightless
Destined for greatness
Can I just be
Destined to see
What’s right in from of me
Purgatory energy
One day when I go walking
I won’t think of my purpose
I’ll skip on the surface
Smooth rock on the stream
That is God enough for me
Hit the ground with a thud
Like a kid in the mud
Love the dirt on my skin
Love your questions digging in
Secret handshakes and baking pies
Love me when I lie
Love me when I cry
When I’m stupid and lame
And can’t remember the names
Of your favorite movies
Im chaotic and goofy
Lighthearted and devastating
Im home in my pacing body as it breathes in deep and recognizes me
And says let’s just be
It’s enough
Anything and nothing
It’s enough
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6. |
Take (feat. Olive)
04:27
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Two seas collide and the moon is taken back
In all it’s life, it’s “Never seen a love like that”
All across Ontario, we found each other in the rivers and the snow
Take me where your heart is at
Sing a thousand stories with sincerity
Discover your own melody
Take me where your heart is at
Laughing lines on your eyes
Only beautify with time
Take me where your heart is at
Take it slow, take me where your heart is at
Our love is an everyday kind of love
No shame kind of love
All of me kind of love
Every morning we’re in it
Every evening we’re in it
And when there’s a bitter taste, we embrace for triple digits
Take it slow, take me where your heart is at
I know you walked in
With bruises on your chin
And it took me a moment to notice
But something about you makes me want to love deeper
Makes me wanna live slower
Makes me wanna talk sweeter
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7. |
Dead Language
03:58
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I’ve still got some charm to spend
I’ve still got my mind
I know that we both tend
To slip through the time
I’m terribly suffered
You’ve got tough skin
I’m terribly awkward
You blend right in
I can’t understand myself
I’m a dead language
All extinct
Baby when the ice caps melt
We can slow drain down the kitchen sink
Everything’s amazing now
Everything’s alright
There’s an ad in the mountain
There’s an ad on the beach
In the sound bites we swim in
The money gets leeched
Darling I’m spent now
Paying to breathe
Remove me from downtown
Put me to sleep
Chaos in motion
Plans set in Stonehenge
We just keep on landing on our own two feet
Lifelong vacation
From hive-mind sensations
We just keep on landing on our own two feet
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8. |
Loaf of Bread
01:25
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I cant smell a thing anymore
It happened too soon
Filling up a room with your perfume
And wondering
If you’re ever coming home
I was at the grocery store
The day after
Heard a laugh there that sounded just like her
I loitered
It doesn’t take that long for someone to pick out a loaf of bread
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9. |
Flying
03:22
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Negative one thousand
100 percent chance
Of lows in the 20’s
Iced out lake dances
Moon shimmers off the snow
6 to 7 inches
At midnight I’ll you know
How I drained down the kitchen sink
I feel like flying honey
I feel like flying
Even if it only lasts a moment
Moon shimmers off the snow
She hovered over the ice rink
They talk about her like a ghost
That drained down the kitchen sink
Slowly now
Ever slowly now
She used to love this band
And with the windows low
I’m flying somewhere safe
Somewhere only we know
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10. |
Impression
03:26
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We were sippin’ on existential dread
Come on, get in bed
A couple melatonin to clear your head
No thoughts tonight you said
“I don’t need drugs to pick a fight
With my self I’m up all night
Hell is a pixel I sleep inside
64 gigabytes
Where everyone I see on the street looks like me
Mirrors coming out of their sleeves
And when I self destruct they turn sharp
Works of art, masterpiece
Fear of the second hand speeding right past me
Something is missing
Whoever’s got the private line of the keeper of time
Tell them to rewind me
Drinking a lie; a means to an end
I’m just trying to find my friends
Dreamt you asked for my two cents
I used them for repentance
When I put my hand outside
I feel like flying
Even just for a moment
Theres a picture of us wasting time
Come on, waste mine
I promise not to fake it
There’s a picture of us wasting time
Come on waste mine
I promise to be patient
Come on, give me your best impression
I promise to be patient
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11. |
Now I Am
03:40
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There must be a man back there
Pulling the strings with care
Computing his way through my life
I catch and I fumble it
Now it’s too obvious
Everything random in time
Yes I’ve been tested
And I’ve blown it
Shutting down feels automatic
Now I am gone
Volume to one
Fade into static
I’m deep in the swimming pool
Small as a molecule
I didn’t make much of a fuss
And floating on top of us
Wounds of the deepest cuts
But wide is the bandage of love
Yes I’ve been stuck
Deep in the muck
The pulse of a burden is slowing
Now I am here
Swallow your tears
My heart is still going
Shedding the shell of rage
Feeling the pains of age
Making the kid in me smile
Doing what wakes me up
Trying to make a fuss
Think I might rest here a while
Giving so much
Losing my touch
I slept inside of myself as a guest
Now I am me
Wholeheartedly
Doing my best
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Brian Bulger Springfield, Missouri
alt-folk singer songwriter.
KC MO.
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